Whoa There, Mama Bear

mama bear

I pride myself on being a relatively calm, measured mum most of the time. When SB falls over, I don’t panic – I put on my best “mum” voice and say “Oh dear!”, pick her up and get her to brush her hands together. I don’t tend to overreact, I don’t get too judgypants-y – I’m pretty cool, calm and collected, if I do say so myself.

Or, at least, I thought I was. Picking SB up from nursery the other day, she was halfway through her afternoon snack of beans and bread. Not one to be separated from her food (that’s my girl!), she brought her beans over to me and let me watch her feed herself, as Daf spoke to the nursery workers about her day.

Thankfully, this meant that I was distracted, and only-just-about heard the nursery workers telling Daf that there had been an ‘incident’ earlier in the day.

SB and another child had been playing with Happyland, when they reached for the toy at the same time, and the other child bit SB on the arm, leaving teeth marks and a nasty bruise.

I managed to stay calm. We finished the beans, waved goodbye to her nursery friends, and got outside. It wasn’t until I checked her arm and saw the marks that my Mama Bear instincts kicked in, and I had to resist the urge to run into the nursery, gather the nursery class in a half circle and do a Liam Neeson style “I don’t know who bit my daughter, but I will find you, and I will… steal your teddy, or something” (I can’t say “I will kill you”, they’re two years old at the most for goodness’ sake).

The thing is, SB was fine. They put a cold compress on it at the time and gave her lots of cuddles and TLC and made her feel better. I was the one who was in a state. I was relieved that she was okay, but every so often I’d think of how she must have felt when it happened; my poor scared baby just happily playing with her friends with a toy she loves (literally half of her Christmas is Happyland this year) and being hurt for no reason, and it made me want to cry and get angry simultaneously.

I don’t blame the nursery. They can’t be everywhere at once, I know, and they’re fantastic at dealing with these incidents. The problem is that it isn’t the first time there’s been a biting incident in recent weeks, and those of us whose children are being bitten are slightly worried that this is going to become a recurring theme.

I have no idea who the child who bit SB is, and even if I did, I wouldn’t say anything. There could be any manner of reasons why their child is biting, ranging from additional needs to just going through a bitey stage. SB may go through a similar stage at some point, I know lots of toddlers do. The parents could be at the end of their tether trying to stop their little one from biting, and the last thing they need is me going up to them all guns blazing and saying “Hey, why is your child biting mine?!”.

Instead, all I can do is put my Mama Bear instincts to one side, comfort SB, and spare a thought for the parent who was told at that pickup that their child had bitten yet another of his or her classmates – because it can’t be a nice thing to hear.

Mummuddlingthrough
my petit canard

9 thoughts on “Whoa There, Mama Bear

  1. Jenna says:

    Let me tell you, the parent of the child who bit SB is probably feeling horrendous too. I had to sign an incident sign the other week because my girl scratched another toddler across the face at nursery. I was mortified. Absolutely mortified.

    Thankfully, it’s just been a one-off incident so far and obviously I’m doing my best to teach to keep her hands to herself.

    But it’s not a nice experience for either party.

    Hope SB is OK and it doesn’t happen again. I’ve experienced it from both sides – and it sucks either way! xx

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    • The Speed Bump says:

      That was why I tried to keep as calm as possible – they’re just toddlers so there’s never any malice involved, and it must feel awful for the other child’s parents, especially as it’s a recurring problem 😦 x

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  2. yummymummystyleblog says:

    I can understand this as it happened to my son too a few times in nursery, but my son has also bitten someone else and I felt terrible, he got a smack on the bum for that one and he never done it again. Wait until SB goes to school, some of the kids are little shits and I wonder what goes on in their household that can make them be so evil. I hate the thought of my son getting bullied, he’s a very good boy and would never treat people the way some of the kids I know from his school do
    Pauline x

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    • The Speed Bump says:

      It’s terrifying to think of what goes on even at such a young age at school 😦 I’m dreading being told that SB has bitten someone, I know it’ll happen because all kiddos go through that stage but I’m not looking forwards to it! Thanks for commenting Xx

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  3. Hannah says:

    I feel your pain, I deal with things in a pretty similar way to you usually, but my eldest little lady was hurt recently at school while defending her big brother. Shes only 4 and shes the most sensitive caring child I have ever met, I didnt stop shaking for over an hour, and when I eventually did I cried. I hope your little lady is okay, this parenting job isnt easy, is it?

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  4. mummuddlingthrough says:

    If your child and mine were at the same nursery this time last year, it was probably her who bit! She went through ‘the stage’, and awkwardly kept biting her friend – whose mum was my friend! It got to the point that when the key worker walked towards me with ‘that form’, if it was her who had been bitten I practically cheered with relief. She stopped as quick as she started…ages and stages. Love them. Thanks for linking up with #coolmumclub

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  5. My Petit Canard says:

    What an awful experience for SB and for you, I totally get the mama bear thing and I am sure I would be the same. But like you said, it cant be easy for the other parent either. Im sure they are equally horrified at whats happened. Its difficult because I guess sometimes these things just happen, children are children and they are all learning whats right and wrong and how to express themselves appropriately. Hopefully this is a one off and it doesnt happen again, but if it does it sounds like you dealt with it in the right way. Thanks for linking up with #MarvMondays again. Emily

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